Greetings from day two of ~officially working from home until April 1~ and the absolute hell that is my anxiety brain flitting between refreshing the New York Times and Twitter every 15 minutes to read more about coronavirus and Amazon dot com to continue to panic order more “provisions” for quarantine even though I have more than enough. (Yes, I absolutely did purchase multiple bags of Twizzlers, they are ESSENTIAL to my sanity.)

Things are very bad right now and I would like for you to know that it’s okay to say that things are very bad. Our healthcare system is on the brink of collapse and no, it is not just like the flu; any sane person should be a little bit concerned right now! The past 48 hours could make up an entire new version of “We Didn’t Start The Fire”, okay? TOM HANKS!? (And, just while we’re here, Chet Hanks.) Keep calm and carry on but wash your hands more, I think the fuck not.

It’s not that I’m so much fearful of getting sick myself (except I do have asthmar, so maybe I am a little) so much as I am stomach-churningly anxious about, to an extreme level, New York City going into apocalyptic movie-style quarantine chaos or, to a more plausible one, my friends getting sick. (I told my therapist covid was making me anxious and she said “You’re young and healthy! You don’t hang out with old people–oh...” the day after I hung out with my 92 year old friend, so I have that going for me.)

Point being: It’s rough out here, and we could all use some distraction, and since we’re all social distancing and can’t really commiserate together, why not find some relief on the internet. Here, a short list of content that always pulls me away from a bad/sad/anxious mood. Take what you need and pass it on, and absolutely chime in with some of your own picks. 

thanks sorry love you bye
carrie

This video of Christine McVie and Stevie Nicks (absolutely plastered) trying to film a happy 21st birthday greeting to Warner Brothers

When Harry Met Sally is on Hulu, as is the entirety of The Mary Tyler Moore Show, and The Birdcage (a truly perfect film) is on YouTube for FREE.

Here’s Lily Tomlin and Jane Fonda getting their birth charts read.

Mike Nichols and Elaine May cracking each other up for 4+ minutes forever and ever amen.

This TikTok. 

I think about Lauren Wilford’s “every woman in a ‘70s movie” every single day.

This 2 year old playing with Animojis….wheezing.

Martin Scorcese talking to his parents about sauce. That’s it, that’s the tweet.

Eve Babitz calling into C-SPAN to describe Joan Didion as “the only sensible person in the whole world in [the ‘70s]” and share that her dinner parties were the first time she ever saw Spode china.

Susan Sontag cooly eviscerating Norman Mailer at Town Bloody Hall. [insert long chilly exhale of a cigarette here]

Laura Dern’s pure episode of Vogue Beauty Secrets (honestly all of the Beauty Secrets series is oddly soothing???)

This bizarre Jeff Goldblum appearance on Pitchfork’s Over/Under

“Big Business--->I Zimbra” from Stop Making Sense (a thing you all should know about me is that my phone autocaps I ZIMBRA, so!)

Haim’s Valentine short (I have yet to make it through “Nothing’s Wrong” [starts around ~8:27] without wanting to buy a drum kit)

Here’s a supercut of Jessica Lange saying “Jesus H. Christ” you absolutely LOVE to see it.

Susan Lucci’s Instagram. Candice Bergen’s Instagram. Laura Dern’s Instagram. Honestly, any boomer/middle aged person’s Instagram that falls into the “Mom On The Internet” category brings me great joy. 

This blog post by Jane Fonda about the time she mistook her dead dog’s ashes for bath salts.

Moira Rose’s commercial for fruit wine.

Anywayyyyyy I know there are more but my brain is short-circuiting now. Wash your hands and send some recs!

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okay that's it that's the end thanks bye